Swiss Army Adds Spork To Its Main Knife

By Lance Beaudry

IBACH, SWITZERLAND – One of the top knife manufacturers in the world announced today that, because of its growing popularity, it will be adding a spork to its main multi-function tool.

Victorinox, maker of the famous Swiss Army knife, broke the news at its headquarters during a press conference called specifically for that reason.

“Let us face it, people do not want to mess around with both spoons and forks anymore,” said Carl Elsener Jr, President, CEO and Chairman of Victorinox.

The spork has exploded in popularity in the last few years, especially as a disposable utensil in fast-food joints and rest-stops.

With its unique design, involving a bowled back half complemented by protruding prongs, the spork has made eating much easier for the average person who doesn’t need to be bothered with multiple utensils.

The new addition apparently also has some environmental justification.

“We truly believe that we are doing our part for the environment,” said Elsener. “Before now, the spork was mostly only available in a single-use format. With the knew Swiss Army tool, people now have a spoon and fork in one, plus a knife, all in the same tool. No more wasted plastic.”