The Last Airbender Cleans Up At The Oscars

By Erika Tatzeryoodge

I can't believe there have only been 31 Oscars since 1929....

HOLLYWOOD – In a very unexpected outcome, The Last Airbender took home the Oscar in all major categories at last night’s 83rd Academy Awards.

The film won Best Picture, while M. Night Shyamalan took home the Best Original Screenplay and Best Director awards. Noah Ringer won for Best Leading Actor and Nicola Peltz got the nod for Best Supporting Actress. To round things out, James Newton Howard won for Best Original Score.

While almost everyone in attendance, not to mention every media outlet in the world, was blown away by the results, Tom Sherak, President of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, believes them to be completely justified.

“Every year the big awards go to some boring movie about the human condition,” Sherak said. “This year I think the opinion accross the board was that we need to change things up a bit. And so we went with a completely implausible story that really doesn’t make any sense at all.

“A better movie couldn’t have been picked.”

The stars of the movie were stunned to hear of the outcome at the Oscars. So little did they consider their chance of winning anything that they weren’t even at the ceremony.

“I was watching the awards on the tele with my pup Rover,” said Ringer in a telephone interview earlier today. “I was just coming back from the can when I hear my name being said. I was blown away. James Franco did a good job of accepting the award for me. I love that dude.”

This marks the first year in history that the Oscars have agreed with the Razzies.